After my previous post, I couldn't begin to imagine how absolutely horrendous our situation would become. Little did I know that the situation we were in last week, was nothing in comparison to what was about to hit us...
First of all, I had my Mastitis which I spoke about in my last post, then Lily's Viral Infection developed into Croup! Croup is absolutely horrible! It sounds like your child cannot breath and they sound so incredibly ill. Croup obviously meant a very sick and miserable child as well as interrupted nights for us as Lily's sleep was continuously disrupted by bouts of coughing fits. Then, a few days later, after I had completed my course of antibiotics, Mastitis hit again! This time in both breasts accompanied by shakes, shivers, migraine and pain. Thank goodness for Mybulin which is a painkiller you can take while breastfeeding and it removes all those nasty symptoms so I can function as a mother and look after my children.
THEN... the day after my Mastitis diagnosis, Zac started to sound ill. After a paediatrician visit, it turns out he had caught the RSV Virus (Bronchiolitis) and had to be hospitalised as he is still so very new and tiny. I was in tears. What more could possibly go wrong! So Zac and I were admitted into hospital on Thursday morning and spent 3 days and 2 nights there. Hospitals are awful - you get absolutely no rest and my poor little innocent baby was subjected to a drip in his tiny hand, physiotherapy to remove the mucous in his nose and chest (horrible tubes and suctioning) and a nebulizer which he hated every 4 hours. I was so relieved to be released on Saturday I have to say!
Then on Saturday night Zac screamed and screamed. He was in so much pain from all the coughing that his poor little body was doing. Eventually after about 4 hours of continuous screaming, we drove him to casualty only for him to pass out from exhaustion in the car. So we turned around and brought him home where he slept for a full 6 hour stretch. Yesterday he thankfully sounded much better and slept for most of the day - something he did hardly anything of the day before. Although he is still coughing, he definitely sounds like he is on the mend. We can expect coughing for the next week or two though as the RSV Virus is not a nice one to get and really attacks the little system. My poor angel.
Last night, just when we thought the light at the end of the tunnel was appearing, Lily woke up screaming! After watching her gestures we realised that she could possibly have a middle ear infection due to the Croup she has had as she kept on pulling at her left ear. We administered some meds and she went to sleep and didn't disturb again during the night. I am watching her this morning and the paed said should her temperature spike or should she show any signs of discomfort again, we are to bring her in.
I honestly feel like setting up camp in the doctor's rooms we have been there so often. We have spent over R6,000 in the last week and a half on medical bills and that excludes the hospital stay which thankfully medical aid will cover. I don't wish what we have been through on my worst enemy. It has been a very trying, exhausting and emotionally draining week and half. I suppose it can only get better from here!
Monday, May 28, 2012
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Rough week
I am exceptionally pleased to see the end of this last week - it was extremely rough and all I can say is thank goodness I have my mom here to help. Murphy's Law when everything came to a head, hubby was away for the night so what I would have done without my mom, I have no idea!
In the early hours of Wednesday morning I woke up with shivers and shakes aka a fever. My left breast was incredibly sore and I knew straight away that I must have Mastitis. I developed an excrutiatingly painful migraine and felt like death warmed up to say the least. I have a relatively high pain threshold so didn't find the breast unbearably painful, but the migraine and fever just left me wanting my bed which, with 2 babies, isn't a possibility! Thank goodness the doctor prescribed an antibiotic which cured the condition in 24 hours, but those 24 hours weren't easy!
While this was all happening, Lily woke up in the night vomiting! So of course as a mom, you forget your woes and go to the aid of your sick child. Lily had a fever and would continue to fight high temperatures for 48 hours! I'm still actually watching her now to see if the fevers are going to return... After having rushed her to the ER on Thursday night at 10pm, the doctor confirmed she has a viral infection which would have to work its way out her system as there is no medication that would help.
Being sick while having to look after your kids is one of the hardest things to endure. Quite honestly, you just cannot afford to be sick and when you are, you just have to "man up" and ignore how awful you feel! In short, moms aren't allowed to get sick! Thank goodness this week is almost over and here's to a healthy and happy family again :)
In the early hours of Wednesday morning I woke up with shivers and shakes aka a fever. My left breast was incredibly sore and I knew straight away that I must have Mastitis. I developed an excrutiatingly painful migraine and felt like death warmed up to say the least. I have a relatively high pain threshold so didn't find the breast unbearably painful, but the migraine and fever just left me wanting my bed which, with 2 babies, isn't a possibility! Thank goodness the doctor prescribed an antibiotic which cured the condition in 24 hours, but those 24 hours weren't easy!
While this was all happening, Lily woke up in the night vomiting! So of course as a mom, you forget your woes and go to the aid of your sick child. Lily had a fever and would continue to fight high temperatures for 48 hours! I'm still actually watching her now to see if the fevers are going to return... After having rushed her to the ER on Thursday night at 10pm, the doctor confirmed she has a viral infection which would have to work its way out her system as there is no medication that would help.
Being sick while having to look after your kids is one of the hardest things to endure. Quite honestly, you just cannot afford to be sick and when you are, you just have to "man up" and ignore how awful you feel! In short, moms aren't allowed to get sick! Thank goodness this week is almost over and here's to a healthy and happy family again :)
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Being a mom
Before I was a Mom,
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a Mom,
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom,
I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put her down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body..
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment
or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a Mom,
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom,
I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put her down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body..
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment
or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom
Drained...
I am very hesitant to even consider it or to verbalise it too often for fear of it turning to a definite reality, but I think my little Zac has Colic. I'm desperately hoping and praying that this is not the case and that my darling little boy is only suffering from an inexperienced digestive system which will rectify itself sooner rather than later. Having had it relatively easy with Lily, I was not prepared for what I've been faced with over the last week or so...
Due to the abdominal discomfort that Zac is experiencing (whatever the cause), he has had me rocking him, shushing him, massaging him, trying to burp him, feeding him more than necessary... Doing absolutely everything I can think of to stop his constant moaning and crying. Out of pure frustration a few nights ago, I actually asked my hubby (who has been sleeping downstairs in the spare room since Zac's arrival) to please help me! Nothing I seem to do aleviates his pain and therefore the crying. It is physically and emotionally draining and I'm exceptionally emotional about the fact that I don't have many moments to bond with my son. He is far too niggly for me to actually find peaceful moments where I can just gaze into his little eyes and get to know him... I'm literally tearing up as I type this as I know how incredibly quickly they grow up and I'm losing precious moments.
Having said that though, I do know that this will pass. However, in the meantime, I am torn. I'm torn between consoling my newborn baby and then giving my little Lily Pie attention. Zac's discomfort seems to take priority which once again, pulls at my heartstrings and "Mother's Guilt" sets in. I have, out of desperation, tried numerous "colic" remedies, something I would never have thought I'd do as I'm very against drugs and non-natural interventions with a baby so young. I don't want to continue on this road so I'm currently looking at going to a homeopath as well as possibly buying a baby rocker which I believe often helps settle the poor little things. I'm hoping that something works and soon!
In the past when moms would say the first 6 weeks of a baby's life are the most difficult, I would think to myself that it honestly isn't that bad. Well... it clearly depends on the type of baby you have! When I had Lily, she was easy. I could lay her down and she would easily self-soothe. She was also a brilliant "burper" and didn't struggle with winds too badly. Zac on the other hand isn't as easily settled and I seem to have him in my arms constantly. I have now resorted to having our domestic worker put him on her back in the mornings so Lily and I can get dressed. Thankfully he seems to enjoy it and does fall asleep.
So even though I'm feeling incredibly drained and anxious with the current situation, I'm still thoroughly enjoying getting to know little Zac better and LOVE seeing how fond Lily is of him. She constantly wants to hold or kiss him which I'm just so grateful for. The last thing I need right now is a jealous toddler especially while Zac is so needy. So, slowly, we are getting more and more used to our little family of 4 and hopefully the next update on little Zac will be more positive and he will have outgrown his discomfort.
PS. On a brighter note, Zac gave me his first smile at 3 weeks old and confirmed it with another smile last night, one day before he turned 4 weeks :)
Due to the abdominal discomfort that Zac is experiencing (whatever the cause), he has had me rocking him, shushing him, massaging him, trying to burp him, feeding him more than necessary... Doing absolutely everything I can think of to stop his constant moaning and crying. Out of pure frustration a few nights ago, I actually asked my hubby (who has been sleeping downstairs in the spare room since Zac's arrival) to please help me! Nothing I seem to do aleviates his pain and therefore the crying. It is physically and emotionally draining and I'm exceptionally emotional about the fact that I don't have many moments to bond with my son. He is far too niggly for me to actually find peaceful moments where I can just gaze into his little eyes and get to know him... I'm literally tearing up as I type this as I know how incredibly quickly they grow up and I'm losing precious moments.
Having said that though, I do know that this will pass. However, in the meantime, I am torn. I'm torn between consoling my newborn baby and then giving my little Lily Pie attention. Zac's discomfort seems to take priority which once again, pulls at my heartstrings and "Mother's Guilt" sets in. I have, out of desperation, tried numerous "colic" remedies, something I would never have thought I'd do as I'm very against drugs and non-natural interventions with a baby so young. I don't want to continue on this road so I'm currently looking at going to a homeopath as well as possibly buying a baby rocker which I believe often helps settle the poor little things. I'm hoping that something works and soon!
In the past when moms would say the first 6 weeks of a baby's life are the most difficult, I would think to myself that it honestly isn't that bad. Well... it clearly depends on the type of baby you have! When I had Lily, she was easy. I could lay her down and she would easily self-soothe. She was also a brilliant "burper" and didn't struggle with winds too badly. Zac on the other hand isn't as easily settled and I seem to have him in my arms constantly. I have now resorted to having our domestic worker put him on her back in the mornings so Lily and I can get dressed. Thankfully he seems to enjoy it and does fall asleep.
So even though I'm feeling incredibly drained and anxious with the current situation, I'm still thoroughly enjoying getting to know little Zac better and LOVE seeing how fond Lily is of him. She constantly wants to hold or kiss him which I'm just so grateful for. The last thing I need right now is a jealous toddler especially while Zac is so needy. So, slowly, we are getting more and more used to our little family of 4 and hopefully the next update on little Zac will be more positive and he will have outgrown his discomfort.
PS. On a brighter note, Zac gave me his first smile at 3 weeks old and confirmed it with another smile last night, one day before he turned 4 weeks :)
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| Sleeping in mommy's arms - 26 days old |
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